Enjoy it.

"What I wish for all students is some release from the clammy grip of the future. I wish them a chance to savor each segment of their education as en experience in itself and not as a grim preparation for the next step. I wish them the right to experiment, to trip and fall, to learn that defeat is as instructive as victory and is not the end of the world... The road ahead is a long one and it will have more unexpected turns than they think."
William Zinsser, College Pressures

We simply cannot manage life. There is not a map that will not have detours. There is not a plot that will avoid digression. But you know what I say? I say life is found in that digression.

What happens when you mess up? What happens when you get the answer wrong? What happens when you change your mind?
Life keeps going. And perhaps you meet someone new, you discover a talent, you find something that makes you happy, you help someone.... at worst you have learned and grown and evolved. You have opened a world of possibilities.

There is not day that you should not find a way to laugh and enjoy yourself. Smile in the face of life. It is too beautiful a gift not to enjoy it.

Everyone has inside of her a piece of good news. The good news is that you don’t know how great you can be! How much you can love! What you can accomplish! And what your potential is! –Anne Frank
Anne Frank suffered persecution in the Holocaust. We all face battles and challenges. Never degrade yours and act as if your issues don't matter; they do. Mental health is as important as physical health. There are things that hurt is everyday. But, that doesn't mean life-- or any single day-- is a waste. Remember that you never know how wonderful you can truly be, challenge yourself to enjoy everyday and find something to be grateful for. 
Laugh! 

Some balls are held for charity
And some for fancy dress
But when they're held for pleasure
They're the balls that I like best
My balls are always bouncing
To the left and to the right
It's my belief that my big balls
Should be held every night
-ACDC, Big Balls

Find humor in simple plays on words, in the irony of the world, in the silly things of your childhood... There is a time to be serious, and there is a time to throw your head back, clap your hands, snort hard, and laugh until you cannot breathe. There is a time to let tears stream down your face and drop to the ground, and a time to jump and dance and let your whole body be giddy. Enjoy all of it! 

"A day without laughter is a day wasted." 

-Charlie Chaplin

There will be regrets, there will be challenges and hardships, there will be pain, there will be so many things you can over analyze and get all caught up in-- but the trick is not to define yourself by those things! Define yourself by beauty! The beauty that is all around you: the beauty of the flowers, of knowledge, of friendships, of a simple touch, of love, of your own wonder. 

This is life. Enjoy it. 

Take it for what it is and make it yours.

"I do not think we have a 'right' to happiness. If happiness happens, say thanks."
Marlene Dietrich

We don't choose which family we are born into, we don't choose which country or state we live in, we don't choose how many siblings we have, we don't choose our innate talents and abilities, we don't choose the way some people treat us, we don't choose the way other people feel about us.

The truth is we choose very little concerning our circumstances. And we are indebted by nobody, entitled to nothing. However, we choose what we do with our circumstances, we choose how we live.

I believe in romantic realists. A realist accurately assesses a situation and responds reasonably and accordingly; a romantic hopes for the best anyway. Being cynical and downhearted will spare you plenty of disappointment and pain, but you, nor anyone else, will be any better for it.
Disappointment will come, people will hurt you and you will hurt people. Some people will disagree with your opinion and some will disagree with your entire existence. You will scrape your knee. You will lose people. You will fail in your job. You will let loved ones down. People will insult you. It is inevitable that there will be darkness.
But even in the dead of night, the moon offers some light.

You don't have to do things because that's how your parents did them, you don't have to do things the way your leaders did them, you don't have to do things the way your peers and friends do them, you don't even have to do things the way you did them before.

Allow yourself to grow and change. And allow yourself to be happy. When disappointment shows its face, take it and move forward. 

See the beauty in life around you. The world is alive, and you are a part of that. Make your part your own.

"The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't have."
-Woody Allen

Cultivate it.

"When you get personal with people, they will get personal with you."
-Dodie, the 80 year-old woman who owns her own antique auction shop in Sylva, NC and is considering going back to school for communication.

The paradox of life is that in the end you get what you put in. "Saving up" will do nothing to help you experience the wealth of life. The only way to really receive here is to invest. It has been said that the truly happy people are the ones who are vulnerable and open and have deep and meaningful relationships. So if you aren't putting yourself out there or putting anything in, don't complain when you get nothing out.

Take an active part in your life. It has been given to you, it is yours. It is no one else's responsibility to see to it that you succeed, that you matter, that you are happy, that you accomplish what you want to, that you get a good grade, that you get what you deserve. However, you have all the tools necessary to cultivate your own life.

A seed, when it grows, has to push through the dirt and manure to reach the air and sun. But it isn't an obstacle so much as the pathway of growth. It is the preparation to becoming the flower or tomato or willow tree it is meant to be. We look at challenges and we say "adversity" with such a negative connotation. There will be times that are challenging, times when you are unhappy, times when things don't go the way they should, times when you put in everything and still get nothing out.

Because this is life. And it is unstable, illogical, irrational, unpredictable, and messy.

So maybe you have to play in the dirt a little to make it to the sunlight. But there is no need to rush out of the adversity. No need to patch up the bad; after all, no patch is well placed. Take your time. Allow yourself to be unhappy, to feel disappointed, to lose the game, to feel hurt. And play in the dirt, work through the manure.
"Life can be carried only in the hands of the unhurried." -Anonymous

This is life. It's messy, it takes work, it takes your participation. Cultivate it.

Find Happiness in it.

“I don't want realism. I want magic! Yes, yes, magic. I try to give that to people. I do misrepresent things. I don't tell truths. I tell what ought to be truth.”
― Tennessee Williams, A Streetcar Named Desire

Here I am in this moment, blowing kisses to a 20-month old boy, standing behind a table full of cookies, wearing a shirt that's three sizes too big.
Here I am in this moment, sitting in my favorite grass, eating in the messiest way possible, feeling nothing but the slightest breeze against my bare arms.
Here I am in this moment, staring at the glass, looking at all the flavors, remembering fourth grade, picking an ice-cream to fill that cardboard cone I actually like so much.
Here I am in this moment, walking into the backyard of a person I have never met in my life, eating catered food, listening to live bluegrass music, and enjoying someone else's party.
Here I am in this moment, saying the things I think and feel, become naked in my vulnerability, laughing without reason, finding comfort in being my full self.

Life itself is a full and enriching experience when you don't try so hard to make it one. It's when you answer the phone and say, "Let me get dressed, and I'll be right there," that the richest memory is made. It's when you allow yourself to sit and do nothing, that you realize how white the clouds are against the blue sky. It's when you, at the end of a full day, take time to stop and exhale, that you really appreciate life.

Stop writing your paper when your favorite song comes on. Look into the eyes of someone that you cherish. Share your umbrella with somebody when it rains. Laugh at the joke a child invents. Introduce yourself by a false name to someone you will never see again.

Nobody said life could only go one way. Don't expect things to be perfect based on some ideals you've developed according to "everyone else." Make your own experience, find your own happiness.

You cannot rely on other people, or what you think should happen, to make you happy. Life itself is full of magic. Realism does not mean negativity. Realism does not mean lack of luster. Realism: the attitude or practice of accepting a situation as it is and being prepared to deal with it accordingly.
The ability to continue despite the challenges, despite the deception or disappointment, the ability to find happiness along with the truth is real bliss. Lying is an unnecessary distortion of life. And life is good.

Wherever you are in this moment, see it for what it is, and find happiness in it. After all, life is just the wonderful conglomeration of a series of unique events. Life is a compilation of the moments.

Experience it.

According to ecology.com/birth-death-rates there are 1.8 deaths every second, which is equal to 107 deaths a minute, which is more than 150,000 a day. However, there are 4.2 births every second which is 252 worldwide births per minute which means that there are over 360,000 births per day. 

We are here when we are here. When we are gone, we are no longer here. What a strange concept to grasp. With so many people being born and dying each day, it is hard not to think, "Do I matter?"

We've all heard the cliche, to the world you may only be one person, but to one person you may be the world. And that is true. Given the numbers, the amount of people that exist and also cease to exist on the daily basis, you have done well if within your time you have affected somebody.

However, how much will you really matter if nothing matters to you? In order to make some sort of affect or change, you have to experience what you are doing. Take an active part in your life.
There is some stigma, you see, on feelings. Just today I heard someone say, "Dealing with feelings? Who likes dealing with feelings?" When I asked why he didn't like dealing with feelings, he said, "Well because.... I don't know. I just don't."

We are sometimes so afraid to involve ourselves and actually feel something because then it may be a bad feeling, it may be something that hurts us. But we cannot know healing without pain, we cannot know good with bad, we cannot know light without dark, and we cannot know living without death.

Life is not for the spectators, but rather for the participators. (Although the numbers are always changing) on the day you were born, you were one of the 360,000... On the day you die, you will be one of the 150,000. What are you doing with that ellipsis? Are you actively participating in your "dot dot dot"? How do you matter within that time?

This is the life you have been given. Experience it while you have it.

Recognize it.

"Living things are dying, dying, dying all the time, and others are taking their place, not even knowing they are taking the place of things that have died." Joyce Carol Oates, We Were the Mulvaneys

We are made of the things of the earth, we live on the earth, we die, and our bodies go back into it. This is the cycle of life. So often we are then to ponder, what is the point of the part in which we live on the earth? Our hearts beat and pump on average 1,900 gallons of blood through our bodies everyday. And then one day, they stop beating and they do not start again.

Talk of death is generally regarded as macabre and avoided, but when we attend a funeral or hear of those who died, we are left to consider our own mortality.
If no one inhabited the planet, it would still spin.
Before you are born, you are nonexistent. After you die, you will never be human again on this earth. You were not, you are, then you are not again.
You will never answer the phone, be in another picture, open any mail, give any more gifts, touch someone's hand,  cash another check, have any more children, set any records, sign any documents... again.

A precious jewel is precious because of it's scarcity. It is not disheartening to consider mortality, but refreshing to know that there is life. Life is limited, but it is a gem.

Make it good.

Freud says that there are three parts of our brains. The Id, the Ego, and the Superego. The Id is what makes you desire what you want when you want it. It is necessary for babies to receive care and food. When they are hungry, their Id makes them wail. This is what makes you want to satisfy your needs automatically and without the balance of the other two parts of your brain would make us all savage.
In Lord of the Flies, young, British boys are stuck together on an island and create their own society. Some of them decide to follow basic moral code and rules of a society while others become a product of their surrounding. They become savage jungle people. All it took for one boy to turn was killing his first pig. When he took control of another life, he lost control of his and let his desires overcome him. These boys were given a free place with an opportunity to do whatever they wanted without societal consequences.
The other day I was at a red light trying to turn left. Nobody was coming. Nobody was at the light. Nobody was next to me to see me. Why didn't I turn left?
Can I say I am morally good for that reason? Or do I simply uphold the rules and standards set around me? By whose standards do I chose to live? Are we in control of our own selves? Are we battling our desires against rules? Or are we conforming to the rules because we know they are for our own good?

But this is life. We are here. It is good. So shan't we live well? If I am well, but what I do makes you not well, I am not as well as I can be. We benefit from the well being of all those around us, and others should benefit from us. Because that is good.
Stop and think about what you are thinking about. Think about what you are doing. Think about why you are doing it. Think about who is involved and affected. Think about how you benefit and how others do as well. Stop at red lights.